What can I say about a year that many would like to forget? 2020 was rough…
The last time I dealt with a dangerously contagious illness was in the early 2000’s. Working in a hospital brought the occasional meningitis or Tuberculosis patient across our threshold; the anxiety and fear of contracting a potentially lethal infection only lasted for a shift or three–to our added advantage we had layers of PPE (personal protection equipment) between us and the patient. To be constantly fearful about becoming exposed to and infected with a virus as insidious and unknown as COVID was all new territory: I would never look at travel and simple activities such as grocery shopping the same way again. In 20 years of nursing, the word quarantine had never crossed my lips, but now was being uttered multiple times per day–every day.
Isolation from our family and friends was difficult. Rumination and worry ruled our days. We cleaned our mail and groceries; unopened Amazon deliveries sat on the back porch for days. Groceries were scarce and essentials were non-existent. When the schools shut down and virtual schooling began, navigating through the programs and monitoring my son’s progress felt like a part-time job–online learning is not for everyone. Varying opinions about COVID complicated matters. The impact on the mental health of my household was palpable–normalcy was not on the horizon.
As the summer ended, the stressful decision came as to whether or not to go back to school in August: I chose to go back to work and my son chose to stay home and continue virtual learning. Our COVID numbers at school were high, as were emotions and hypervigilance. School nursing was worrisome: What if I caught COVID? What if I was one of those carriers that remained asymptomatic but contaminated my family and friends? The word overwhelming was an understatement. The light that glimmered at the end of the tunnel did not become visible until the vaccine arrived in early 2021; so as this post is about 2020, I’ll say that the year ended with little changed from the beginning.